I made plans last night to surprise one of my best friends with a trip to the movies, because it was her birthday and she's been going through a rough time recently. But as the day wore on I felt sicker and sicker, until it got to the point where I had to tell her I wasn't going to make it because I wasn't well enough. She seemed okay about it; I can't even count the number of times I've had to cancel on her because my symptoms were flaring, so I guess she's pretty used to it now. It just made me feel like crap, that I couldn't do something for her even on her birthday. That's one of the things I really hate about POTS - the fact that I generally can't put a lot of effort in to the people around me, because I'm using it all on making myself feel and look healthy.
I have to cancel things a lot because I'm not feeling well. Between schoolwork, medical appointments, exercise, household chores, and seeing friends and family, it's really tough to not overextend myself. I'm trying to get in to the habit of doing two things a day; vacuum and lunch with a friend, or see my endocrinologist and sit an internal. One of the hardest things is the fact that I have to exercise six days a week, even though I know that when I exercise it's going to make me feel terrible afterwards. But if I don't go on the bike enough now then it'll take me even longer to feel normal again. It's all about the long run with POTS, but that doesn't make the present day any easier for me.
Anyway, the next couple of days are going to be spent resting and recuperating so that I can hang out with her sometime this weekend, maybe even for a half hour today if my symptoms relent a little.
Hope you have a great day, and keep your chin up.
Bridge
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