Tuesday 4 November 2014

I'm A Terrible Blogger

So I've been MIA for a while now. Haven't really got an excuse, just regular feeling sick POTS stuff.

I think I struggle with blogging because I feel like I have nothing to write about except POTS, which is so damn boring. But maybe I'll try start fresh (again) and write about more stuff, with a little bit of medical thrown in (because no matter how hard I try I can't escape it).

Anyway this is me saying that I'm back (again).

Good luck,
Bridge

Sunday 14 September 2014

Falling Behind

I'm trying to do some work on my internals, because I am so far behind and have four to finish in two weeks. But I just can't think. 

I'm writing about Steven Spielberg, comparing scenes from two of his movies - one is from Saving Private Ryan, and is when Caparzo is shot for trying to save the child who reminds him of his neice. The other is from Empire of the Sun, and is at the beginning when the family is driving through the poverty-stricken city of Shanghai to attend a fancy dress party. I have to look at the two scenes and see what techniques Spielberg uses to illustrate theme and make them his own. 

It's a really straightforward internal, just a simple essay. But I can't put down into writing what's in my head, and half the time there's nothing in my head because I'm so tired. Or my head is pounding too hard.

I can't stop thinking about how the old me, the healthy me, would have found this a piece of cake. I thought I was making progress, but at the moment I'm just going through one of those times, when I wish that I was healthy and able to do simple things. 

I'll go have a lie down and try again tomorrow. 

Good luck,
Bridget

Thursday 11 September 2014

Complaining

I live a lonely life. I was walking upstairs, feeling my head spin around my neck worse than usual, when I realised I haven't hung out with my friends since the ball. On the 16th. It's been practically a month, and I've become some sort of hermit.

But that's okay. I've been more sick than usual recently - stomach problems have made everything incredibly hard, and I've had to have a nap every day (sometimes two of them) because I'm so damn fatigued. I'm seeing a gastroenterologist on the 23rd, and my GP won't do anything to help because he's scared of doing something wrong. Which is fine, except for the fact that I'm in pain and my life is falling apart again.

It's awful timing, because my mock exams are on this week - practice exams for the real thing happening in October - and I've been sick for the past month, unable to study. I don't even think I'd be able to sit still in a room for three hours right now. And on top of that I haven't been able to complete my internals, so I might not get enough credits to get into university. You need 60 credits minimum, and I have 25.

I guess I've been feeling pretty down recently. I was doing well, getting better, making it to school. And all of a sudden something has come along again and hit me in the face and my life has to come to a standstill while I wait for my body to stop attacking itself. Its hard to feel good about yourself when you're constantly bloated, gaining weight and you're skin's going to shit because you haven't been able to properly eat vegetables in a month without getting severe stomach pains.

This has been a bit (understatement) of a ranty post. I'm just nervous about next year. Any suggestions on what I should do if I can't go to uni?

Anyway.
Good Luck,
Bridge

Wednesday 27 August 2014

Time Spenders

I spend around 60% of my time in bed, resting from the other 40% of my time out of bed. It's just what happens when you have a chronic condition! Spending that many hours in bed can make you really really bored, but you're not feeling well enough to do schoolwork or something that involves a lot of thinking. So here are my top 3 time spenders when you are stuck in bed

1. Youtube
I am an avid watcher of youtube videos, especially beauty ones. I'm not particularly into makeup, but any videos about how to make yourself look more awake and alive than you really are can be a great help! Also the girls that film beauty videos are always so upbeat and cheerful, so it's nice to watch and lifts me up when I'm wallowing.

2. Reading
I know a lot of people don't like reading, but I am head-over-heels in love with it. I like a mix of non-fiction, young adult, suspense, and heaps more. At the moment I'm reading The Diary Of Anne Frank, and it's incredible.

3. Brainstorming
Just because you feel crappy now, doesn't mean that you'll feel terrible forever. I like to spend my down time researching POTS, looking for activities that I can do that I'll be able to do, looking up recipes that won't hurt my salt-riddled stomach. I've gotten really close to giving up because of everything I can't do, so it's good when I can see all of the things that I still can do, as it gives me hope.

So there are my top 3! There are lots of other things that I do to keep myself occupied and away from self pity, but these are the easiest. What do you do to keep yourself distracted?

Good luck!
Bridge

Thursday 21 August 2014

POTS and Exercise

If you have POTS, you know that when you exercise you feel like your head is going to roll of your body or float up to the ceiling because you're so lightheaded. It sucks, there's no lying about it. But there's also no way to avoid it - keeping your exercise to a routine and making goals is essential to any POTS treatment. 

So what's my plan? I bike Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday for half an hour with little/no resistance. It's not to work my muscles, but to train my body to get used to being upright. On Wednesday and Sunday I do yoga, to help stretch and tone my muscles, and on Saturday I have a day off. It's only four hours of exercise a week, so it's not that bad and it's definitely working!

Every couple of months I change my cardio to something a bit more challenging. I've been on the recumbent bike for a while (my base level, but you could also use a rowing machine as it's also recumbent exercise), and this last week I've moved up to the regular upright bike. It's definitely more challenging, but the more I'm on it the easier it will get and the better I will feel when I'm upright, on and off the bike! The key is not to push yourself too far and relapse your symptoms - baby steps please. 

So that's my plan! Do you have an exercise routine, or any tips and tricks to share? Leave a comment telling me what they are!

Good luck,
Bridge

Tuesday 19 August 2014

Ballin'


With POTS you have to miss out on a lot of social stuff, no matter how hard you push yourself you just can't make everything. In fact from experience, pushing myself has just made me miss out on more. 

So when I decided I was going to my school's midwinter ball this year, I knew I needed a game plan. I rested for the weeks leading up to it, so that I didn't tire myself out before it began. I got ready with my friends, and then went home and rested while everyone went to pres, and we all met up again at the ball. I planned everything ahead of time so that I wouldn't be stressing. Oh, and of course, I had A LOT of salt. 

But it was all worth it in the end! I got pictures, I saw all of my friends, and I had my boyfriend looking after me and watching out for me the entire time. I couldn't quite make it out on the dance floor - the standing up and loud music was just too much for me - but I still had a fantastic time!

Now I'm experiencing the aftermath, of course. I knew I'd feel terrible afterwards (this is the worst I've felt POTS-wise in quite a while), but I made the decision to go for it. Sometimes you just have to choose your battles, and being able to look at ball pics with a smile on my face makes it completely worth it.

What battle are you conquering this week?

Good luck, 
Bridge

 

Thursday 14 August 2014

Spring Is In the Air!

We've been dealing with some pretty terrible weather here in NZ recently. The torrential rain and high force winds have been particularly bad, even for Windy Wellington. But for the past couple of days it's been clearing up, the sun's been coming out, and it's been SO NICE. So today I thought I'd talk about my spring wish list: one for fashion, one for beauty, and one for life.

Free People Halter Neck Bralette
Is it awkward that I'm talking about bras? Just roll with it. This bralette (bralet? bralette?) has no underwire which means that it doesn't feel nearly as uncomfortable as normal bras, plus the lace details means that it looks really nice peeking out from under simple outfits. So it's a win win! If you're bigger chested you might need a little more support, but for us members of the IBTC (itty bitty titty committy), this is a really nice one to go for! I particularly like the duck egg blue colour, as it's a nice pop but not too bright, and the copper is really nice too.

Topshop Sheer Lip in Red Alert
I love the look of red lips, but am always so paranoid about wearing them in public! The sheer formula makes it easier to wear, and the warm orange undertones makes it a bit more spring appropriate. Only downside is that it's from Topshop, which means crazy shipping, but a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do!

Do More Yoga
The bad thing about spring for me is that that means it's exam season (cries inside). I have school exams in a few weeks, leading up to the big catastrophe in November, so stress levels are going to be through the roof. My stress repellent this year will be yoga! I love how my body feels during and after yoga - completely relaxed, stretched out, refreshed. So the aim is twice a week this spring, to help me through the hectic season.

So that's my Spring Wish List! What's on yours this year?

Have a great day!
Bridge


Tuesday 12 August 2014

R.I.P.

Hearing yesterday that Robin Williams had died from suspected suicide wasn't a massive hit to my life at first. I thought it was terrible, while visions of Jumanji ran through my head, and then continued stacking the dishwasher. It was once I'd logged on to social media and saw everyone talk about all of the amazing things that he had accomplished and how he had changed people's lives that it really hit me; this was a man who had made fantastic movies that made people laugh and cry and feel something real throughout his life, why did he choose to end it?

I suppose that's the point, though - people with depression don't choose, it just happens. They can't see the light at the end of the tunnel, they can't see a point to their lives. I recently read a book by Viktor Frankl, (Man's Search For Meaning) and it was all about how people find a way to survive if they have something to live for. It was what helped himself get through the holocaust.

And now that I think about it, it's true for me too. I attempted suicide earlier this year - one of the blackest times of my life. I didn't feel like there was anything to live for, that nothing was going right and nothing was ever going to be right. I couldn't see the love and support that I was getting from the people around me. It took an attempted overdose to realise that I have so much left to accomplish, so much more love to give. Now when I'm feeling down, I tell someone about it. I don't want to take the easy way out.

This blog post is a bit all over the place. And a bit scary to post. I've been feeling a bit down and my head's been spinning, I needed a place to vent. It's always better to talk than to keep it all bottled up inside.

R.I.P. Robin Williams.

Bridge

Sunday 10 August 2014

Hall Time

It's that time of year - time to apply for university halls of residence. In a weird way this is more daunting than applying for the actual university.

Applying for halls in New Zealand seems easy, until you get to the bit where they ask why you think you should be admitted. I hate answering questions like that, because there's no way you can write a convincing argument without seeming like you have a ginormous ego. Not only that, but what can I contribute to the dorm community when I spend 80% of my life dizzy in bed? That's when you have to make up bullshit about how you push through it all, even though it feels like you're lying through your teeth.

Part of the application asks about what you've accomplished over the years academically, culturally, and leadership-ally. I whipped out all my school reports, all of my certificates and awards that Mum's  been hoarding for years. And it was depressing. Seeing how POTS has directly affected my life, and not being able to avoid it... it's hard. Seeing how much I used to accomplish, and watching it dwindle year after year until you have no academic achievements or leadership positions this year just sucks.

Anyway, after two hours of filling in forms, I've handed it in. Now just waiting for the gods (a.k.a. University Admission Board) to decide.

Anyone else applying for uni this year?

Hope you have a great day!
Bridge

Friday 8 August 2014

Coaster Love


My Mum's birthday is coming up on the 26th, so I've been experiencing the annual conundrum of what to get her for a gift. Until I was browsing Anthropologie, and I came across some gorgeous coasters. I know what you're thinking - really, Bridget? Coasters? (That's certainly what my boyfriend said). But these are a whole new level. I love the crystal design, and the colour range is fantastic, so I knew I'd find one of Mum's favourites. I had to snatch them up. (And I was impressed with super fast shipping to NZ!)

Kind of random, I know. But if you're looking for a great gift to buy a member of the fam or a friend, these coasters are definitely something to look at. 

Hope you have a great day!
Bridge

Monday 4 August 2014

Book Favourites #1

If you know me, then you know that I LOVE to read. It is one of my favourite past times, I find it relaxing and exciting and sometimes life changing, when I come across something particularly special. So I thought I'd start a series on my blog, where each month I go over the best books that I read from the previous month. Hope you enjoy!

Memoirs Of An Imaginary Friend by Matthew Green
Wow. Wow wow wow. I loved this book so much. The premise is that a boy has an imaginary friend, who then has to save the boy when he disappears. It is such an amazing book, that really makes you think, along with lots of comedy. It might sound a bit immature, but I found it incredible. Definitely one to recommend.
You can find a link to it on Amazon here.

I Am Malala by Malala Yousafzai
This is an inspirational novel about a girl who was shot by the Taliban for standing up for women's rights and education. Malala is an incredible woman, having accomplished so much while still being the same age as me. It shows the importance of standing up for what you believe in, as well as the difference that one person can make when they are passionate and vocal. You can find a link to it on Amazon here.

Neverwhere by Neil Gaiman
Gaiman, you've done it again. A fantasy novel about the underside of London, I found this such an enjoyable read with lots of twists and turns along the way. Even if you're not a fantasy reader, I think this would be one to browse just for the phenomenal writing throughout. You can find a link to it on Amazon here.

Hollow City by Ransom Riggs
This is the sequel to 'Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children' - another great book - and this sequel is an excellent follow through. The book is written alongside photographs which are showed every few pages, which really helps the reader to visualise and find themselves in this peculiar world. If you've read the first one, I'd definitely recommend the sequel. If you're looking for a new series to dive into, this is it. You can find a link to it on Amazon here.

The Man Who Couldn't Stop by David Adam
If you're interested in psychology, you've come to the right place. This book is sll about Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) - its history, challenges, variety, and how debilitating it can be, as well as ideas on how to overcome the condition. I thoroughly enjoyed this book, especially the examples of people who have OCD along the way - from the beginning you realise that OCD isn't just about people who compulsively wash their hands, but so much more. Probably my favourite of the month. You can find a link to it on Amazon here.

So there you go! A mix of non-fiction and fantasy this month for the favourites, and they were all excellent books that I'd highly recommend.

What was the best book you read last month? Or your favourite book in general?

Hope you have a great day!
Bridge

Wednesday 30 July 2014

Covering Up Scars

I've got things on my body that I'm not happy about, not proud of. I also have three school balls this year that I'm feeling pretty stressed about as is with my POTS flaring.

I've had to do a lot of thinking about whether I want to show my scars and embrace who I am (fuck what everyone else thinks) or whether I should take the more modest, more appropriate route and cover them up.

I've decided to be modest for one last year. One last year of covering up the scars, one last year of hiding my past, one last year of stunted growth, and next year I'm going to wear whatever the hell I want, because why not?

Not gonna lie, it scares the shit out of me showing my arms at the moment, showing my scars and all of my mistakes in public. But I need to learn to embrace my insecurities, either ignoring them or working with them to accentuate the things I love about myself, and eventually the insecurity won't have such a strong power over me. They won't fade away, but they won't hinder me either.

Saying that, there's a time and place for everything, and my last year of high school is not the best place to bare it all - I already get enough strange looks for being the sick girl, I don't need even more for being the sick girl who's covered in scars too.

Next year - first year of uni, first year embracing me - I'm so ready.

Have a great day!
Bridge

Sunday 27 July 2014

Long Time No See

Hello!

It's been a while since I posted on here. Honestly I just became overwhelmed with school, all of the responsibilities that I have to undertake if I want to make it into university next year, as well as making these huge decisions about what I want to do there. It's just really stressful, and I've never been the best at coping with stress. Something to improve on.

So the past three weeks of my life have been school holidays, which has been really nice. Three weeks to just slow down, take a deep breath, and spend time with the people I love. And also try to catch up on some schoolwork - I feel like there's no time for me to relax at the moment if I want to meet the university requirements. I have to remind myself everyday not to run myself down too much or else anything next year beyond my bed will be off the table.

I've been thinking a lot about my place in the world recently. With all my stress at the moment it's made insecurities come to the surface, and I've been trying to cope with them in positive ways as much as I can, but it's tough. I find myself insanely jealous of people who know what they want to do with their life, while I'm sitting here applying for three different degrees and two different universities because I have no clue. I feel like I need some time to myself,  to figure out who I really am, but I don't know how to do it. It's scary to take that leap sometimes.

Anyway, enough rambling! I am excited to get back into blogging, so watch this space.

Have a great day,
Bridge

Monday 26 May 2014

Cooking Fails

I've come to the conclusion that I CAN'T COOK. Cookies turn out dry, cupcakes are overmixed, meat is either too raw to eat or so overcooked it's not pleasant. And it sucks, because I love to cook! It's relaxing, it doesn't take too much effort, and it's a great excuse to dance around my kitchen singing along to the radio. And if I get dizzy, or headache-y I can usually just take a break before getting back into it. It would be a win win, if the food ends up decent. But usually it gets a couple of bites out of it before being tossed.

I don't understand - my dad just finished a Cordon Bleu cooking course and my mum makes restaurant quality dinners every night. How did I miss out on the cooking gene?! But I cook anyway because hell, it's still fun even if the food wouldn't get a 10 from Pete and Manu. (MKR reference, anyone?)

Is there anything you love to do even though you suck at it? Do you know any fool-proof recipes I could attempt??

Have a great day!
Bridge

Thursday 15 May 2014

The Symple Life

One of the hardest things for me has been to track my POTS symptoms. For about a month I carried a little notebook around with me, writing every little thing down - what I ate, when I slept, who I saw, how I was feeling, intensity of symptoms - everything. And it took so much time I found myself dreading having to write down my entire life. But the benefits of having a diary of your symptoms are so helpful when it comes to POTS, to find out what's affecting your condition negatively or what's helping. I was just hating having to write it all down.

However! A couple of days ago I found an app for my iPhone that has made it SO MUCH EASIER. It's called Symple, and it's a symptom tracker and health diary. It's amazing! I can track my symptoms everyday, write notes about my day (I typically write my salt and fluid intake) and have a list of different factors that could have affected my symptoms (e.g. seeing friends, exercising, going to school etc). It can track up to 20 symptoms at a time, and it makes it so easy to keep on top of it all. It cost $3.79 on the AppStore, but in my opinion it was totally worth it. (the journal I used to write in cost around $6, so it's more cost effective for me!)

My one complaint is that you can only record a symptom once a day, which isn't great for me seeing as my symptoms vary from morning to post exercise to night-time. But that's okay; I've just listed my symptoms as different parts of the day, like 'Headache AM' and 'Headache Post Gym'. It's a downside because it takes up more room in my 20 symptom max, but for me it works just fine, and I'm loving it!

If you want to track symptoms and factors day to day, I'd definitely recommend Symple. It's the best app I've found for keeping on top of it all!

Hope you have a great day!
Bridge

Monday 12 May 2014

School Time!

This week I'm heading back in to school! I'm so excited to be back with my friends, learning all sorts of new stuff, and really just having attainable goals. Sometimes being POTS-free can kind of seem unattainable as I know it's going to take years to do, so being able to complete a little more school than I used to is a kind of proof for me that it's working.

First off I'm just going to see how I go. I'm going to be attending for one hour a day, going in for Chemistry. It sounds like it's not a lot, but just thinking about it makes me feel tired. There's the socialising, the noise, the thinking, the sitting up and walking around - it's pretty tough for me to do those things on their own, and all together it's going to be really challenging, but worth it. If it turns out that after this first week I'm completely shattered, I'll try upping my salt and fluid, before thinking about going from four classes a week to maybe two or three. I really hope that I'm going to be able to go to chem full time though, as I've had to learn a lot that I missed last year on my own and I don't want all that hard work to be for nothing. 

A few things that I'm going to be doing to try and make sure I last the lesson are:
  • Resting right before and after. If I don't rest before, then I won't be able to function during the lesson. If I don't rest afterwards, I'm jeopardising going to class the next day.
  • Balance my salt and water. If I have an afternoon class, I'll put extra salt in my lunch. If I have a morning class, I'll put salt in my tomato juice and make sure to have a small breakfast so that my blood is circulating around my head, not my gut. 
  • Don't be too hard on myself. If I'm having a bad POTS day, then pushing myself to go to class will only make it worse, not only for the day but probably for the rest of the week. If I'm having an off day, I can always email my teacher or ask my friends what I've missed. Getting stressed about missing class because I'm ill is only going to make it harder for myself. 
So that's my plan for getting back in to school. Baby steps, and see how I go. My POTS is still much worse than it used to be because of my stomach infection last month, so I'm going to have to be strict with myself to not push it too far (as I have a tendency to do!). Is anything new or different happening for you this week?

Hope you have a great day!
Bridge 

Thursday 8 May 2014

To Do Listing

I've decided to start writing to do lists every single day. There have been so many times when I've come to the end of the day and I've realised I forgot to do something that needed to be done, because I get distracted with trying to rest and look after myself. Don't get me wrong - those things are just as important, but I still like to stay on top of my life and my commitments.

Another reason I think I'll benefit from it is so that I can pace myself. There are four categories I want to tick off every day: school, home, exercise, and self. If I do something strenuous for self, like go to a movie with friends, I'll balance out everything else to make sure that I don't push myself to a point where I can't bounce back the next day. As long as I do something each day from each of those categories, no matter how small, I'll be content and happy with my day.

My To Do List for today is:
write notes on amines and carboxylic acids for Chemistry
do one hour of English folio writing
vacuum bedroom
do 1/2 hour on recumbent bike
bake almond maple granola for breakfasts

I also like the idea of being able to physically tick things off the list, so that even though some days it feels like I'm good for nothing, I can see that I'm achieving a few small things each day that add up.

Do you write to do lists? Do you think they help you stay organised and feel achievement?

Hope you have a great day!
Bridge

Monday 5 May 2014

Catching Up

Sorry that I've been MIA recently! It's been school holidays here in NZ and I've been spending as much time as I can with my boyfriend;  he goes to boarding school a two hour drive away so when he's in town I spend pretty much all my time with him.
I've been pretty bad POTS wise recently. My compression stockings have been really irritating my skin, making my legs itchy and bumpy and constantly uncomfortable. I've tried exfoliating and moisturising and all that jazz but none of it's been helping, so at the moment I'm not wearing them. Because of that I've tried to be strict about my water and salt intake, upping each a little bit. But I've been getting major headaches everyday so I might have to change it back and just slow things down a bit.
So that's been my last couple of weeks. This week I'm just doing work from home and starting to go back in to school for an hour a day next week. I'm excited to get back in a real classroom rather than my bed.
Hope you have a great day!
Bridge

Friday 25 April 2014

Cancelling on Friends

I made plans last night to surprise one of my best friends with a trip to the movies, because it was her birthday and she's been going through a rough time recently. But as the day wore on I felt sicker and sicker, until it got to the point where I had to tell her I wasn't going to make it because I wasn't well enough. She seemed okay about it; I can't even count the number of times I've had to cancel on her because my symptoms were flaring, so I guess she's pretty used to it now. It just made me feel like crap, that I couldn't do something for her even on her birthday. That's one of the things I really hate about POTS - the fact that I generally can't put a lot of effort in to the people around me, because I'm using it all on making myself feel and look healthy.
I have to cancel things a lot because I'm not feeling well. Between schoolwork, medical appointments, exercise, household chores, and seeing friends and family, it's really tough to not overextend myself. I'm trying to get in to the habit of doing two things a day; vacuum and lunch with a friend, or see my endocrinologist and sit an internal. One of the hardest things is the fact that I have to exercise six days a week, even though I know that when I exercise it's going to make me feel terrible afterwards. But if I don't go on the bike enough now then it'll take me even longer to feel normal again. It's all about the long run with POTS, but that doesn't make the present day any easier for me.
Anyway, the next couple of days are going to be spent resting and recuperating so that I can hang out with her sometime this weekend, maybe even for a half hour today if my symptoms relent a little.
Hope you have a great day, and keep your chin up.
Bridge

Tuesday 22 April 2014

Playlists

Recently I've been listening to a lot of music. I've always been one of those girls who belt out to the radio when driving along in the car, but when I get home in my room I generally listen to the same CD over and over again. However my boyfriend recently made a playlist full of songs that were a blast from the past, and it made me realise that I really love just sitting and chilling and listening to a great track. There's something about listening to a song that you love that can completely change your mood; it's great because it's something I can do just chilling from my bed when I'm not feeling well, and it doesn't require much concentration.
I've now made two playlists of my own on Spotify. (Which I love by the way, even though the ads can kind of ruin the vibe.) One of them is Good Tracks, just a random collection of songs that I love to sing along to and put me in a good mood. Some newly discovered, others that are oldies but goodies. The other is slow, and it's songs that I like to listen to when I'm trying to relax, or just in a chill mood. Hope you listen to them and enjoy!
Have a great day!
Bridge

Monday 21 April 2014

What's POTS?

Today I thought I'd write a post explaining a little bit about POTS. It's a pretty unheard of condition, which means that most doctors have never even heard of it before, let alone know how to treat it.
POTS stands for Postural Orthostatic Tachycardic Syndrome. For me, when I change from a sitting to standing position my blood pressure plummets and my heart rate increases by about 30. The longer I stay standing up, the worse I feel. My main symptoms are: dizziness, nausea, headaches; and these lead to other symptoms like word recall problems, tremors in my hands, sleeplessness, and lots more.
The severity of POTS symptoms across sufferers varies a lot. Some people can carry on with their normal lives, and just increase salt and fluid intake to help with blood pressure. Others can't stand up without fainting within a minute. Me, I'm in between. Going to school is too much for me, so I do most of it from home, and a lot less than what my peers are doing. I've had to quit rowing and netball because both made me faint, and I now try to do recumbent biking and strength training, though it makes my symptoms flare up like crazy. My mornings start with a glass of tomato juice with an extra 3 grams of salt added, and putting on my thigh high compression stockings. I can do day to day activities for an hour maybe two, before desperately needing a rest. It's been tough, and I've had to do a lot of grieving for the life I wanted to live, but I'm one of the lucky ones. I can still look after myself, see my friends once a week, and travel extremely slowly and steadily on the road to recovery. I hope to reach my destination in 2-3 years.
So yeah. There's my explanation of how POTS directly affects my life. Here's a link to a bit more information on the actual condition, as I haven't done a very good job explaining exactly what it does. Do any of you have POTS, or have had to deal with a debilitating condition like this one? I'd love to know how you deal with it, and stay positive when it all looks so bleak.
That's it for today, hope you have a good one, and had a happy Easter! (I demolished a white chocolate egg that left me feeling really nauseous, but it was totally worth it!)
Bridge

Friday 18 April 2014

Struggling with POTS

Today, as expected, I wasn't feeling well. I had a really big night going to see Hugh and the band, and it's going to take me a while to recover.
I think that's the most annoying thing about POTS - how quickly it can all change. Earlier this year I was doing really really well; getting school work done, seeing my friends, doing my exercise program. But this past week I've had a really bad stomach infection, and it's pretty much resulted in the last three months of progress completely deteriorating. I'm back to getting dizzy all the time and getting a major headache, getting nauseous when I eat or drink and constantly having concentration and word recall problems.I mean it's not my fault and I know that - a stomach infection is technically always a risk when you eat out, but it just sucks that I'm going to have to spend the next three months working up to a point that I was at just two weeks ago.
I struggle quite a lot with staying positive with POTS, I guess. I'm glad I went to the concert though, it was so much fun spending some time with my mum and sister and the music was phenomenal. And now that school is on holidays I'll be able to see my friends a lot more anyway, and just spend the next couple of weeks recuperating. Baby steps, Bridge. You'll get there!
Anyway, hope you have a great day! Also please comment! I'd love to know your thoughts/have a chat with some of you. See ya!
Bridge

Thursday 17 April 2014

LOVED IT



Well, that was pretty cool! Hugh Laurie and The Copper Bottom Band exceeded my expectations and more. It was such a feel good concert, all the oldies getting up and boogying to the jazz music. 
I think Hugh made an excellent choice switching from acting to music; you can tell that he's extremely passionate about what he does, and the people that he does it with. If you have the opportunity to go, definitely grasp it! 
The only bad thing was that my POTS flared up and I got a major headache so I couldn't enjoy it as much as I wanted to, but it was worth going, and I'd go again tonight if I had tickets. 
Now I'm off to download some Louis Armstrong, I recommend that you do to! 
Have a great day!
Bridge

Wednesday 16 April 2014

Hugh Laurie and The Copper Bottom Band

Today I've woken up feeling my usual POTS-y self. Sore stomach, nausea, throbbing headache. A little annoying because I am doing an internal today for Trigonometry that I thought I was going to do pretty well in, but it's pretty tough when my POTS is flaring up as it affects my concentration and memory as well - yay.
Aside from my complaining, what I wanted to talk about today was the fact that I'm going to a concert! Hugh Laurie and The Copper Bottom Band are coming to Wellington tonight and I'm so excited to see them perform. I first became obsessed with Hugh Laurie when I started getting sick 3 years ago, and started watching House. Since then he's become one of my favourite actors because of his charisma and general attitude. And I love the fact that he's branched out into music too. It's gonna be so cool to see him and his band live tonight! They perform a mix of blues, salsa, and South American music, can't wait. Here's a link of the band performing for the BBC.
I'll let you know later how it goes. Hope you all have a wonderful day!
Bridge

Tuesday 15 April 2014

HI!

So, hi. I'm Bridget, nickname Bridge. I'm a 17 year old kiwi living in Wellington, suffering from POTS. You've probably never heard of it, but it sucks. As a result I have a lot of spare time, and a lot of thoughts racing through my mind, and thought I'd become a part of this online community, since it seems pretty cool. 
Bit about me - I do school mainly from home. I'm interested in art, cooking, quantum physics, music, films - pretty much anything! I like writing, back can't commit to more than a couple of pages. I read an insane amount, classics to YA fiction to science books, I love it all. 
I used to play netball and was a rower for a season, but then I got sick and now I can't do much of that anymore without fainting. Hence the 'spinning' in my blog name - my head is twirling pretty much constantly.
And that's me! I'm excited to start this blog, writing about all sorts of different things. I guess you could consider this a 'lifestyle' blog, but really it's just the life of a sick teenager spending her time bored in her room. I'll try to make it more interesting than that sounds! 
See you later, 
Bridge